Now, before we dive into all of that, I want to start by offering you a special invitation. On May 17th, at 01:00 pm Eastern time, I am hosting a masterclass all about The Magic of Coaching. Now, I have been working on this framework, The Magic of Coaching, for almost a year. It's been marinating in the background. I have actually recorded a private podcast series, all about The Magic of Coaching, that I will be releasing shortly. But before I do that, I want to invite you to a masterclass, where I am going to walk you through what The Magic of Coaching is all about and how it can serve you as you build and grow your skills as a coach as well as your coaching business. If you are a longtime listener of the Coach with Clarity podcast, or if you are one of my students, or if you're a member of the Collective, then, you know, I have a soft spot in my heart for a good acronym. And so magic, M-A-G-I-C is an acronym. Each letter represents a critical component for your coaching practice. And in this masterclass on May 17th, I am going to walk you through what you need in order to create MAGIC in your coaching practice. It is going to be an incredible event. Yes, there will be some of me teaching and lecturing, but there's also going to be time to take your questions. I have never, ever publicly taught about The Magic of Coaching before, so you are in for a special treat. This is brand new information, really a brand new framework that truly I've been working on since the summer of 2022. And now is the time. It's finally ready for its big debut. So I would love to invite you to join me for this free masterclass. That's right, it's absolutely free. All you have to do is go to coachwithclarity.com/magicmasterclass, that's all one word, magic masterclass, and sign up. Then you'll be on the list. You'll get all of the information about where to go, what time, all of that, so that you can be a part of the special Magic of Coaching masterclass that is going live on May 17th. And if you can't make it live, no worries. There will be a replay, and I will send it out to you shortly after we wrap that masterclass. But trust me, if you can make it live, I strongly encourage you to be there, because there will be opportunities for you to ask questions, seek clarification, and there may just be a special bonus or two for everyone attending live. So you are not going to want to miss it. Head to coachwithclarity.com/magicmasterclass to enroll in the special Magic of Coaching masterclass that's coming to you on May 17th, 1:00 pm Eastern time. So I believe that's noon central. Eleven mountain, 10:00 am Pacific time. And then for my friends across the pond, if you're in the UK, I believe that's 06:00 pm your time, 07:00 pm if you're in Europe – past that, it may be the middle of the night for you. So if you're up and about, feel free to join us or catch the replay. All you have to do is head to coachwithclarity.com/magicmasterclass to secure your spot, and we'll get to spend some time together on May 17th. I'm so excited. I cannot wait to share this framework with you. So don't miss out. Coachwithclarity.com/magicmasterclass. It's free. It's going to be a blast. I will see you there. 

All right, my friend, let's talk about what agreements are in a coaching context. And I think we should also clarify the difference between agreements and expectations, because they are two different concepts. They connect with each other, they inform each other, but they serve a very different purpose. So in the context of a coaching relationship, I think of agreements as being guidelines that both I, as the coach and my clients agree upon. We commit to following these concepts, these ideas, in order to work together towards the client's desired outcome. And that's why it's so important to clarify our agreements from the start. We want to make sure that we're all on the same page, we're all heading in the same direction, and we all understand the rules of engagement, if you will, for this coaching relationship. Some of these agreements will be part of your personal business policies and procedures. Some of these agreements will hopefully be explored in the written contract that you have your client sign before you begin working together. And then some of the agreements may be ideas or concepts that you and your client come up with together in partnership with each other. And in order to do that, in order to create agreements together, we want to make sure that we practice open communication and next level listening. And these concepts should be familiar to you because we have talked about them in the previous episodes as part of this Art of Coaching series. If you head back a few weeks to episode 159, that is where we did a deep dive into next level listening and what it means to show up fully for your client and practice listening skills that go beyond the typical active or reflective listening. So we are definitely going to pull those next level listening skills into our conversation with our client when we are establishing new agreements with each other. And this process goes a long way towards creating that mutual respect and trust that we want to foster in our relationship with our client. And in fact, we talked about that at length in episode 161, all about creating trust centered relationships with our clients. So what I hope you see is that all of these things we're talking about in our special Art of Coaching miniseries, they all work together. They are all threads that when we weave them together, we create this beautiful tapestry that represents the relationship and the work we do with our clients. And so we're building on all of these skills. We need next level listening. We need to know how to create relationships anchored in trust in order to then establish, communicate and maintain these agreements with our clients. 

And as the name would suggest, an agreement is something that all parties involved commit to following. We agree to follow these agreements. We want to make sure that we have clarity around what we are asking our clients to commit to and what we as the coach are committing to as well. We want to make sure they're clear, they're specific, and they should outline exactly what is expected from everyone involved. So oftentimes this will be the coach and the client. And so we'll agree to the roles and responsibilities for each party. But as we've talked about in past episodes, you may have other stakeholders involved in the coaching relationship as an example. A sponsor is someone who pays for the coaching, but they may not be the identified client, they may not be receiving the coaching. So now you have a coaching relationship that involves the coach, the client and the sponsor. And so as part of the agreements, we want to include the sponsor and we want to make sure that everyone is on the same page around what the expectations are of the sponsor with regard to payment and also what the expectations are of the coach and client in terms of communicating progress and updates to the sponsor. All of that should be specified in advance as part of your coaching agreement. So that we're all on the same page, we all know what to expect and we can cut down on any misunderstandings or confusion in the long run. 

I realize just now as I've been talking about agreements, I've also mentioned expectations a few times. And that makes sense because agreements cover some of the expectations we may have or we may bring into the coaching relationship. But I just want to pause for a moment and discuss the difference between agreements and expectations because they are two separate concepts. And if we conflate them, if we treat them as the same, then we may wind up creating some problems for ourselves down the line. Because expectations are different than agreements. Expectations really at the heart, they're assumptions or maybe they’re beliefs about what one person or one party thinks someone else will do or should do. So we all hold expectations about what we want from the people in our lives, our partner, our kids, our boss, our coworkers, our kids. We have expectations for how we're going to show up in relationships. They're often based on past experiences or maybe we're making assumptions about the other person. Maybe, in fact, often expectations can be informed by cultural and social norms. But the thing about expectations is that they're not necessarily openly discussed or even agreed upon between the people involved. So you can imagine how in a coaching relationship if your client is coming in with certain expectations of you as the coach and those expectations have not been communicated to you, they're assumed. So you are unaware. It's going to be more difficult for you to, number one, meet those expectations because you don't know what they are. But number two, you haven't necessarily agreed to those expectations. Those expectations may be outside your scope of practice or beyond what you have the capacity to provide as a coach. So if your client is coming in with expectations that you can't or are unable to meet, that could create conflict from the beginning or even down the line in the relationship. So because expectations are often implied or assumed, they lack a clarity and a specificity that we want to see in agreements. Because in fact, unspoken or unclear expectations, they're often at the heart of misunderstandings, arguments and conflict really in any relationship, but especially in a coaching relationship. So I think it's important to remember that agreements are external. They have been clearly specified and everyone is on the same page, whereas expectations are more subtle. Perhaps they haven't been voiced and if we're not clear with the other person around expectations, it could actually lead to conflict or misunderstanding in the long run. So part of our work as the coach, early in the coaching relationship, in fact, I would say we want to do this before we even take someone on as a client. We want to do this as part of our sales call or discovery call or our onboarding process, whatever that looks like for you. We want to make sure we spend some time speaking with the client about their expectations for this experience. We want to make the assumptions and the implied explicit, because then as the coach, we know what our client thinks they're getting into and then we can respond to that ahead of time. We can either agree with that expectation and reassure the client that yes, this is a part of this coaching package or this coaching offer. Here are the ways, as your coach, I can help meet that expectation. Here's what I expect from you as the client in order to make that happen. So we can take the implied and make it explicit and we'll be good to go. 

But of course, there may be times when a client is holding an expectation of you or of the coaching experience that is unrealistic or outside your scope of practice. And if that's the case, we want to acknowledge that at the very start. At that point, there's a few things that we as coaches can do when we are met with expectations that are unrealistic or improbable. First and foremost, we can just say, “That's not something I'm able to provide.” So just because a client is holding an expectation does not mean you have to meet it or that you're obligated to meet it. And you can say to the client, what you're saying falls outside the scope of a coaching relationship. It might be helpful to let the client know that what they're asking for is better suited for a different type of relationship. Maybe it's a consultant or a mentor. Maybe what they really need is a therapist rather than a coach. Whatever it is, we can let the client know that it's not inappropriate that they have that expectation. But that expectation may not be filled within the coaching relationship and they may want to seek outside support in order to get that need met. So that's the first thing we can do is simply say, “I hear that's your expectation. That is not something I am able to meet.”

Another option is to do a little negotiation. So perhaps your client has an expectation that is not something you typically offer as part of your coaching package or your coaching offer, but maybe in this situation it's something you'd be open to. This is why we want to bring in our next level listening and our communication skills in order to talk with the client about why they are holding this expectation, why it matters to them, how it connects to what they want to create, what their ideal outcome is. And then we as the coach can decide the extent to which we want to meet that expectation. So maybe we can meet them part way. Maybe the expectation the client is bringing is completely reasonable and it's something we're happy to meet. But whatever it is, we want to have that conversation with the client in advance. We want to make sure that any additional requests are incorporated into our written contract. Because then from the very beginning, we are all on the same page. We know what the relationship will include or what it won't include, and it will cut down dramatically on any misunderstandings or conflict in the long run. I have worked with hundreds of coaches over the last seven years that I've been running Coach with Clarity. And when I provide mentorship or counsel to coaches that are experiencing conflict with clients, nine times out of ten, the root cause of the conflict comes down to unclear agreements and mismanaged expectations. That's why it is so important to be clear about them from the very beginning. It allows everyone involved to have a shared understanding of what is expected. We also talk about what actions can be taken from all parties involved, including the client, in order to achieve the desired outcomes. So when we have that sense of accountability and when we've made those commitments to each other, then we all agree to uphold our part of our agreement and it just leads to smooth sailing in the long run. So now that we're clear around what agreements are, how they differ from expectations and why they are so important, let's talk about some common agreements we will want to include in our work with our clients.

Some agreements will be more about logistics and some agreements will be more about the relationship. So the more logistical ones I actually find are the easier ones to navigate. So for example, let's talk about payment. You will want to have an agreement in place with your client around the total cost of your coaching services and then how you expect your client to compensate you for your coaching. So any payment agreement should outline the amount that is due. If there is a payment plan in place, you want to be clear around the number of payments, the total for each payment, when they're due, what will happen if a client is late on a payment. You also want to make sure that you're really clear around cancellation and refund policies as well. These are things that should absolutely be included inside a written contract and it's always a good idea to go over them with your client either during your connection call or during your first coaching session. And I know sometimes it can be difficult to talk about payment and money with clients, but the fact is, this is a business. You are a business owner. You are providing a valuable service. You deserve to be compensated for that. And so all you're doing is letting your client know the best practices for ensuring that you are fairly compensated for your work. Having an agreement like this ensures that everyone is clear, the coach, the client, and the sponsor, if applicable. We want to make sure everyone is clear on the financial aspects of the coaching relationship so we can avoid any issues in the future. 

In addition to payment, we also want to explore the logistics around time and scheduling your coaching sessions. So your agreement should include how long the total relationship will last. So is this a three month endeavor? Six months? Is it a year? Whatever it is, let's be clear about it from the start, and then within that time frame, how often will you and your client be meeting? How often will you have coaching sessions? You may also want to address what your policies are if your client needs to pause or take a break from coaching. Is that something you allow? If so, do you have a time limit? Is there a time by which your agreement needs to come to an end? All of this should be specified in your written contract and again discussed during that first session. We want to make sure that the client understands what we as the coach, expect from them so that they can meet those expectations. And we want to make sure that the client knows all of this in advance so that they can manage their time, their schedule, their payment schedule. And it just ensures that everyone has what they need in order to have a really powerful and effective coaching relationship. 

So I would say payment and time or scheduling are the two main logistical issues that need to be discussed as part of your coaching agreement. So in addition to these, we also need to explore what I consider to be more relational in nature when it comes to our agreements. One of the key things we want to address early on as part of the coaching agreement is the role of confidentiality in the relationship. We want to be clear with the client what is kept private, what is kept confidential, and what limits to confidentiality may exist. So, for example, you want to reach an agreement with your client that basically says anything discussed in coaching sessions will be kept confidential, will be kept private, unless the client gives permission to share that information with others, or unless the client is sharing information that you are legally bound to disclose. Depending on the state you live in, depending on whether or not you are a licensed or registered provider in another career, you may be held to different expectations regarding reporting. You may be considered a mandated reporter when it comes to child abuse or elder abuse. If so, your client needs to know that so that your client understands the limits to the confidentiality you are agreeing to. So talking about that from the very beginning helps create that relationship built on trust that we talked about in depth during episode 161, all about creating trust centered relationships. Confidentiality and honoring privacy is part of that, but our clients deserve to know if there are any limits to that and what that looks like. So typically, I will let my client know that whatever we talk about in session, I hold that sacred, and I commit to honoring their privacy and confidentiality to the extent I am allowed to do so by law. And again, those parameters are going to differ state by state, province by province, country by country. So it's very important that you as the coach understand your legal obligations with regard to privacy. So privacy and confidentiality is absolutely an agreement that we want to articulate with our client and make sure we're all on the same page. 

Another thing we want to talk to our client about in advance is how we communicate with each other. We want to be clear what it looks like to have a relationship with each other outside of session. So how often can your client reach out and contact you? In what ways can they contact you? Are you okay with email? With texts? With Voxer? What methods work for you and for your client? Also, how quickly can your client expect a return email or phone call or text from you? These are all things we want to be clear about in advance so that the client knows I can email my coach on a Friday night, but I may not hear back from them until Monday or Tuesday. So if you have a policy in your business around response times, that is something we want to be clear about from the beginning with our clients. Having open lines of communication also helps us with other agreements we need to clarify, including the roles and the responsibilities for everyone involved in the coaching relationship. So we want to be clear around what the coach is agreeing to do as part of the coaching relationship. So, for example, are you providing additional feedback and guidance on written materials and works in progress? Are you open to having on the spot coaching calls if an emergency comes up? So what roles and responsibilities are you agreeing to as the coach? And then we also want to be clear with the client what our expectations are for their contributions as well. I find it really helpful to let my clients know that coaching is not a done for you service, but rather it is a done with you service. I am here to be your thought partner. I am here to support you and help you create and take action on your ideas in service of your goals and your vision. But at the end of the day, you, as the client, are the person actually doing the work and actually following through on any plans we create together. And those plans, those goals, are also things that we want to be clear about in our agreement. So we want to know what our client wants to work towards. We want to outline everything that the client wants to accomplish and also what a successful outcome looks like. We want to create an agreement around what we're looking at and what we're measuring to know whether we're making progress and if we're staying focused on those desired outcomes. And then when we're clear about the roles and responsibilities that stem from the client's goals, everyone knows this is my job, this is in my wheelhouse, or this is outside what I've agreed to. 

So in today's episode, I have spent a lot of time defining what agreements are and talking about how to establish them. But I don't want to blow past the importance of maintaining agreements as well. That's why I think it's helpful for the coach to periodically check in with the client. Maybe it's at the halfway point, or if it's a longer coaching experience, maybe it's at the quarter or even a third of the way through. But we just want to touch base with the client and do a quick check on our agreements to make sure they're still in place, they're still working out well, and if there's anything that needs to be renegotiated, there's an opportunity to do that as well. Typically, I find in my coaching relationships, once we set those agreements at the beginning, we're pretty much good for the entire coaching relationship. But to be fair, sometimes things change, goals can change, relationships can change, and so we may need to revisit those agreements. That's why it's always a great idea to at least at the halfway point in your coaching relationship, to just check in, make sure everything's working well, and to see if there's anything that needs to be revised. It's not uncommon for a client to change their goal midway or even earlier in a coaching relationship. It's also not uncommon for a client to experience some external factors that have really changed their situation. Maybe they've switched jobs, maybe they've moved, maybe they've ended or started a relationship. These external factors can really impact a client's ability to maintain the agreements we established early on. And so if that happens, then we, as the coach, need to guide the client through a conversation around what is realistic for the client to commit to and how might that change the agreements we've made so far. In addition to those external changes, sometimes a client may experience some internal changes or internal experiences that complicate their ability to follow through on their commitment. So something we talk about, and this actually might be a future episode is when a client is experiencing a level of resistance in coaching. Clients may resist creating certain changes in their beliefs or their behaviors or their habits, even if they've previously agreed to do so and even if it's in service to their larger goal. And there's all sorts of reasons why clients might be experiencing that type of resistance. They may be fearful, they may be uncomfortable, they may not believe in their own capacity to create that change. And so as the coach, it's our job to be mindful of when that resistance may be showing up and to support the client through it. Typically I don't find the need to change a pre-existing agreement in order to support the client through it. This is really where powerful coaching, next level listening and using all of the tools in your toolkit can really support you. However, sometimes the resistance may be such where we do need to take a look at the original agreement and see if there's some modifications that need to be made. So when resistance comes up, that can certainly affect our ability or the client's ability to follow through and maintain the agreements that we set earlier in the relationship. That resistance may also lead to a lack of follow through, so if a client has made a commitment during a previous coaching session and then they're not seeing that commitment through, we as the coach need to follow through on that and partner with the client to explore what is preventing them from following through on their agreement. It may be a lack of motivation, perhaps we haven't identified the right goal or behavior. There may be competing priorities or perhaps there's a values clash, maybe there's more than one value at play and they're competing with each other and so the client is feeling stuck and they're not following through. Maybe there are other external obstacles that have shown up and that is preventing the client from taking the next step. Whatever it is, it's our role as the coach to see that, to gently present it to the client and partner with them, to identify any challenges and to come up with strategies to overcome these obstacles. All of these have the potential to lead to misunderstandings with our clients, which is another potential barrier to maintaining agreements. And typically we have misunderstandings when there's a lack of clarity. And that's why from the beginning I've stressed the importance of being clear, of being outspoken, of really being explicit around these agreements because that helps prevent misunderstandings. And yet sometimes, even when we do our very best, misunderstandings are going to happen. So if and when they do, it's really important that everyone involved be clear and specific to ask clarifying questions, to try to identify the root cause of the misunderstanding and then work together to come up with a solution that serves everyone involved. 

So my friend, I hope our exploration of the role of agreements in the coaching relationship has been helpful for you today. We've taken a look at what agreements are, how they're connected to but different from expectations, why having clear agreements matter so much in a coaching relationship. And then we've talked about the different ways that we can create agreements with our clients, communicate those agreements with them, and then also what to do if we experience any challenges in maintaining those agreements. This is all part of being a powerful, masterful coach, having these kinds of conversations with our clients. And hopefully it reflects why everything we've talked about so far in this series around creating relationships anchored in trust, around next level listening, everything we've talked about in The Art of Coaching is absolutely salient when it comes to establishing and maintaining agreements with your clients.

 So I think we have covered a lot today. I think this is probably a good place to pause and we will pick back up next week with our exploration of The Art of Coaching. And we're going to be looking at awareness and growth, how we can support our clients in enhancing their own self awareness, and how that then connects to their own personal growth. It's going to be such a great conversation, so I hope you will join me then. Make sure you have subscribed to or that you're following the Coach with Clarity podcast, that will ensure next week's episode shows up automatically in your feed, so you never have to worry about missing the Coach with Clarity podcast. While you're at it, don't forget to enroll for the upcoming masterclass all about The Magic of Coaching. We will be kicking it off on May 17th at 01:00 pm Eastern time. There will be a replay if you can't make it live, but you have to register in order to get that replay. So don't forget to head to coachwithclarity.com/magicmasterclass to sign up and secure your spot today. It's free, it's informative, we are going to have a great time. And don't worry, the link to that and the link to everything we’ve talked about in today's episode can be found in the show notes. All you have to do is go to coachwithclarity.com/162 to see detailed show notes, a transcript, links, all of that good stuff is waiting for you right there. 

And until next week, my friend, my name is Lee Chaix McDonough, reminding you to get out there and show the world what it means to be a Coach with Clarity.